Share your thoughts

Well shortly after coming back from Stuebenville, these were my thoughts on the whole expereince.

> At the stuebenvile youth comfrence they have adoration. It was the most intence thing I have ever felt. I was a chaperone. I had 3 guys in my group and during adoration it was my job to make sure that they were okay and to pray over them. The adoration time was supposed to be for them I had a job to do.

I am still sorting out what happened that night. I have some sort of sense that I might have been given a gift. But, I doubt that sense thinking that maybe that is just because I want to have recieved a gift. I tried so hard to resist. I had a job to do. Make sure my teens are okay. When Jesus came down that middle aisle there was a golden ray that was reflecting off the mostrance and father turned towards us and the ray swept across me and a wave came over me and my knees gave out. I struggled to stand. To keep praying for my teens. I fel back and was leaning on the chairs in the row in front of me. I fought to stand.

I got back up and resumed making sure my teens were okay and kept praying for them. I was following Jesus all the way up to the petit balcony with one hand out stretched toward him and the other down on my teens. Praying harder then I had ever prayed before. I could feel it sooo intense going through me. Building. I was was fighting even harder to make sure my teens were okay that wave came over again. knees gave out. Fighting to stay standing. Making sure my teens are okay.

It jsut kept building and building. And I dropped to my knees. On my way down I grabbed holds of the back of my chair to brace myself. That feeling just kept growing. More and more intense by the second. SOo intense. I had a dealth grip on my chair. I was sqeezing it so tightly. oveerwhelming is an understatement. The harder I tried to fight it the stronger the feeling got. I was trying so hard to fight it to be there for my teens. I was down. I couldn't fight it and I gave in. I remember feeling hands on me from all around. I heard Mike praying for me. and then silience for just a brief second. What seemed like about 20 seconds.(for all I know it could have been 5 minutes) everything went silent. the music the singing the crying the laughing. Totally silent. Body went kinda numb. I no longer felt the hands on me. didn't feel even my clothes on my body. And then I came back. I heard the the music and everything again. I was breatheing hard and then I was okay. That intense feeling had passed. i pulled myself back up to my feet and tried to start praying for my teens.

It was humbling to stay the least. I think that HE was definately commenting on my doing for ohers so much that I don't allow enough to be done for me. Cause I fought it with every fiber I had to make sure I was doing for the teens. And well I had a Theophany(theo meaning God and phany being your but. "God knocked me on my butt")(quote curtesy of the bible geek) He made sure that I got what he wanted to give me whether I was gonna allow it or not. What that was that he gave me I still am not sure. But I am sure it was a good thing. I am feeling called to start going to daily mass. I think that I may start going before work.

I would highly suggest anyone to go to a stuebenville youth comfrence. They are all over. If you are 20 and under go as a participant. If you think you are too old. GO ANYWAY. Over 21 go as a chaperone I can personally vouch that even as a chaperone you will have just as powerful of an expereince seeing your teens "Experience the Glory" of God.

**- I have started going to daily mass. I find that it is a good way to start the day and I get my daily dose of scripture, and it helps me to resist "temptation." And, I still higly recomend that anyone get involved with stuebenville anyway you can. Whether it be Young apostles, CHaperone, Special Ministries, or any number of ways jsut get involved you'll be glad you did/**